I was thinking about a few things earlier today.  One of the things that came across my mind is why didn't I do this sooner?  I love the energy I have, going to the gym, my clothes getting bigger on me day by day, what is not to love about this.  If losing weight, working out and eating healthy can make you feel so good, why in the world did it take me so long!!  After thinking for a while I had come to the conclusion that I wasn't ready.  I wasn't ready to give up my old habits, to exchange going out for going to the gym, I mentally would not have committed to this.  I enjoyed my old life way too much but now I am enjoy this life.  I had to learn that I was not giving up everything, I was just giving up the bad.

This season on the Biggest Loser the theme is "No Excuses" and that is all it truly is.  I would have an excuse for everything.  I think I even went as far as making up a reason as to why it was okay to drink pop and eat fried food.  I would have an excuse as to why I couldn't make it to the gym that I was currently paying a monthly fee for.  Thinking back on this today I kind of had to laugh.  At the time when I had excuses to not go to the gym I worked 7-4.  Well now I generally get to work at 6:30-4 and go straight from work to school until 7.  Once I leave class I go straight to the gym.  Funny now that I have school and work I can now find the time for the gym.  I have become a very competitive person and I find myself getting more competitive daily.

I signed up for my first 5k on March 17th.  I am extremely nervous but I know this is just a small step to many bigger steps in my future.  Today we were going to go on a "practice run" for the 5k however we missed the group we were supposed to go with.  So two of my coworkers and I decided to still go ahead with it.  I walked and ran some, but not as much as I would have liked to.  I was so frustrated with myself that I didn't do as good as I wanted to.  I kept beating myself up about that all day.  After school I went to the gym and I took the Hip Hop class but still felt frustrated with my run earlier today.  I hopped on the treadmill and decided to run.  The very thing that was making me frustrated was the very thing that I went straight to in order to get rid of that frustration.  It hit me that I want to become a strong runner and when I didn't meet those expectations that I had I was ready to give up on running.  Reality check:  I have only been at this lifestyle change for a month, it will take time for me to get to the level that many of my coworkers are at.  I also realized how big of an inspiration they have all become.  Deanza, Jennifer, Heather, and Chloe are avid runners and have inspired me so much to become a runner.  I look forward to the day that I get to run with them and will be able to keep up.  In the meantime I will just keep practicing and getting stronger everyday.